Im happy but there is a heavy feeling of sadness in my heart that I just can't remove. Why am I like this?

For much of my adult life, I interpreted this sadness as something being wrong - with either myself or my life in general.

Your job is not to be the manager of your life, but the one who discovers yourself fully.

But unlike before, there is no more resistance to the sadness.

Why does everyone hate Anthony Joshua so much? I get that he isn’t the best heavyweight boxer ever but people claim he’s a no skill fighter but he has an Olympic gold medal, a world championship, and beat Klitschko, a dominant force in boxing

Now, this may sound like a story of failure and giving up, but it’s actually a story of liberation.

It’s difficult to put into words exactly what caused what, but to the best of my ability to describe it, I felt as if my will to keep fighting was beaten right out of me.

It’s the most beautiful and liberating thing in the world.

Is the Trump-Zelenskyy meeting a preview of what the US is going to do to Taiwan?

It’s here now, writing to you.

What I am trying to say is that when you stop trying to change yourself into something you are not, you give yourself the gift of discovering yourself as you already are.

Be who you already are.

Why are conservatives banning liberal books? Why are conservatives so offended by the teaching of racism and other topics?

So if you are sad - like me - then be sad.

You are like me, then.

The sadness was still there.

I'm pretty sure that my dog is transgender, how would I go about transitioning it?

It wasn’t until about 10 years ago that I finally fell out of that ferris wheel of trying and failing to fix myself.

You are the masterpiece you came here to discover.

It’s still here.

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When I stopped trying to force myself to be something I am not, I gave myself the freedom of being who I am.

This interpretation lead me on a path of self improvement, to fix what I considered to be “wrong” with myself.

I was tired of trying and failing.

Study shows that early humans climbed trees and worked with stone - Earth.com

But no matter what I read or practiced, I could never make the sadness budge for longer than a few fleeting moments - and even then, it was likely due to me being distracted from the sensation of sadness rather than anything actually shifting.

And the sadness?

Needless to say, my failed attempts to fix my sadness simply brought me more pain and suffering.

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It’s impossible to overstate the freedom and peace I discovered, and I realized the only one who had been keeping those from me was… me and my imagined standards and expectations for how I had imagined I should be.

Without resistance, sadness has a sense of beauty and depth I cannot find otherwise in life.

I had run out of hope.

Isn't it a turn on to have sex with a girl in a skirt or in a tight spandex?

What most people don’t know unless they’ve looked more closely is that there is also an element of deep, profound sadness that has always been with me since as long as I can remember.

So I finally threw my hands up and said something to the tune of “fuck it, since I can't seem to change, I’ll just be whatever I am then.”

Most people that know me would probably describe me as a social, happy, and somewhat quirky person with a twisted sense of humor.

Observations from Day 5 of OTAs - Cleveland Browns

In the absence of a should, I was free to be as I am.

I was tired of fighting.